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August 27th, 2007

One-Punch

These are all proven techniques, listed in increasing order of effectiveness. Hot tip: in real life, I’d advise trying method 2, then method 1, then finally the one-punch. For ultimate results, do them one after another without pausing:

“There are squirrels on your shoulder! But that’s what makes us so similar, don’t you think?” *POW*

Job done.

Techniques for dealing with angry drunks

Method 1: Diplomacy. Matt and a drunk are standing facing each other.
Matt: "Can't we all just get along?"

Method 2: Confusion.
Matt: "I just loved your new album!”

Method 3: One-punch.
Matt punches the drunk out.

Tooltip: Problem: solved.
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